Whom to marry: Just being a Christian doesn’t guarantee good marriage and family relationships. In Hosea 4:6 the Lord says, “My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge….”
- Gods will: Don’t go into relationship outside Gods revealed will. You are not ready to go for into relationship if you don’t love God will more than you love your fiancé. Don’t allow feelings to trample on your relationship with God. It is much easier than you think to allow your heart to overrule your conscience. If you don’t control your emotion, it will control you. Whenever your desire is demanding priority to love someone without the conviction of Gods approval, it overcome your love for God. Love God more than fiancé.
- Mary someone with good Christian virtue: Wife: Gen 24:63-65 And as he looked up, he saw camels approaching. 64 Rebekah also looked up and saw Isaac. She got down from her camel 65 and asked the servant, “Who is that man in the field coming to meet us?” “He is my master,” the servant answered. So she took her veil and covered herself. Don’t marry a lady that is still on her camel. A lady that is still on her camel is not a wife. A wife material is that woman that will come down off her camel to meet her husband. The camel of pride, arrogance, friends etc. She did not only come down but too a veil to cover herself as a sign of respect to him. 1 Peter 3:1-2 IN LIKE manner, you married women, be submissive to your own husbands [subordinate yourselves as being secondary to and dependent on them, and adapt yourselves to them], so that even if any do not obey the Word [of God], they may be won over not by discussion but by the [godly] lives of their wives, 2 When they observe the pure and modest way in which you conduct yourselves, together with your o reverence [for your husband; you are to feel for him all that reverence includes: to respect, defer to, revere him — to honor, esteem, appreciate, prize, and, in the human sense, to adore him, that is, to admire, praise, be devoted to, deeply love, and enjoy your husband]. Husband: Titus 2:6-8 In a similar way, urge the younger men to be self-restrained and to behave prudently [taking life seriously]. And show your own self in all respects to be a pattern and a model of good deeds and works, teaching what is unadulterated, showing gravity [having the strictest regard for truth and purity of motive], with dignity and seriousness. And let your instruction be sound and fit and wise and wholesome, vigorous and b irrefutable and above censure, so that the opponent may be put to shame, finding nothing discrediting or evil to say about us.
- Don’t bind yourself to someone who pull in the opposite direction. A farmer yoke animal of the same species, train to respond to the same type of command. 2 Cor 6:15: Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers [do not make mismated alliances with them or come under a different yoke with them, inconsistent with your faith]. For what partnership have right living and right standing with God with iniquity and lawlessness? Or how can light have fellowship with darkness?
Animals that yoke together are animals of similar size, strength and temperament because they will work the best together or they will end up pulling each other to an opposite direction. Don’t marry someone who pull in the opposite direction or you will continually be tug-of-war.
- Don’t marry blindly: not everyone that call himself or herself a Christian is, don’t enter a relationship without you being convinced that the other party is a Christian. Don’t be blinded my love and think that because a person goes to church is a Christian, beware of those who make commitment to Jesus because of relationship and not because of Christ.
- Marry a person who is morally committed to God. Your fiancé will help you go to heaven or hinders you.
- Don’t marry from a man’s physical appearance: 1 Sam 16:11: But the Lord said to Samuel, Look not on his appearance or at the height of his stature, for I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees; for man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.
- Marry a person that is spiritually sound
Sound spiritual life that is full of purpose (be careful enough as not to skip this because some churches do as long as other criteria are met such as age, financial buoyancy, academic/professional achievement, career excellence, an apartment, a job, etc, the list is long). The first criterion is the most important. But just spiritual life alone is not complete yet. You need to ask yourself before thinking about marriage, “what is God’s purpose for me?”.
- Don’t marry a man without a purpose
You must understand that not all spiritually sound brothers and sisters have known God’s purpose for creating them; not all Christians know that their ministry is the reason God created and saved them, and that that’s what God has called them to live for. You must know God’s purpose for you as a Christian before getting married. If you don’t know it and are not working towards fulfilling it, then your life doesn’t have a purpose yet. And if your life doesn’t have a purpose and you go into marriage, your marriage too won’t have a purpose. And purpose is very important: without it your life, marriage, etc., When God joins, He expects a better and more effective result from the enjoined developed brother and sister, to get a twofold-strong result. It is when this happens in your marriage that you can say “one man of you shall chase a thousand, and two, ten thousand”. In Genesis 2, Adam had a purpose before he found Eve. The first thing God showed and gave him before Eve was the beautiful Earth and a garden prepared for him to keep and dress. That was why he was created. He was nothing without God and that ministry.